2010 CFB Playoff: Round 1 Results

The first round is complete, and things pretty much went as planned. There were only two upsets, and they were minor, with 5-seeds beating 4-seeds (West Virginia over Texas A&M and Utah over Nevada). Three of the four number one seeds advanced without trouble; Tulsa gave Auburn a good game, but Auburn was victorious by a touchdown.

The second round sets up some high profile matchups for schools from non-BCS conferences. Boise State travels to LSU, Utah visits Oklahoma, and TCU heads to Wisconsin. There are also two rivalry games on tap. Auburn hosts Alabama in a rematch of the Iron Bowl and an old Big East rivalry is renewed as West Virginia visits Virginia Tech.

Results

SOUTH

1-Auburn def. 8-Tulsa 27-20

4-Alabama def. 5-Nebraska 42-3

3-Boise State def. 6-NC State 31-10

2-LSU def. 7-Maryland 33-14

EAST

1-Virginia Tech def. 8-Florida Int'l 52-3

5-West Virginia def. 4-Texas A&M 25-21

3-Missouri def. 6-Florida State 31-28

2-Ohio State def. 7-Mississippi State 31-13

MIDWEST

1-Oklahoma def. 8-Miami OH 50-14

5-Utah def. 4-Nevada 45-24

3-Michigan State def. 6-Florida 17-15

2-Stanford def. 7-Hawaii 46-41

WEST

1-Oregon def. 8-Central Florida 40-7

4-Oklahoma State def. 5-South Carolina 34-10

3-TCU def. 6-Notre Dame 30-20

2-Wisconsin def. 7-Connecticut 40-36

College Football Bracket

I thought this would be fun, so here we go. I created a rating formula, seeded teams, and placed them in a bracket. These games will be simulated by NCAA Football 11 and we'll see how this tournament works.

I won't bore you with seeding details and rules and whatnot, just enjoy.

SOUTH: Sugar

1-Auburn vs 8-Tulsa

4-Alabama vs 5-Nebraska

3-Boise State vs 6-NC State

2-LSU vs. 7-Maryland

EAST: Orange

1-Virginia Tech vs 8-Florida International

4-Texas A&M vs. 5-West Virginia

3-Missouri vs 6-Florida State

2-Ohio State vs 7-Mississippi State

MIDWEST: Fiesta

1-Oklahoma vs 8-Miami (OH)

4-Nevada vs 5-Utah

3-Michigan State vs 6-Florida

2-Stanford vs 7-Hawaii

WEST: Rose

1-Oregon vs 8-Central Florida

4-Oklahoma State vs 5-South Carolina

3-TCU vs 6-Notre Dame

2-Wisconsin vs 7-Connecticut

First Round: December 11

Sweet 16: December 18

BCS Bowl: Day of BCS Bowl

Semifinals: January 7 and 8

Championship: January 15

Laundry List

So I decided to make a list of things that I hate or piss me off, because today, there were many of those things. The title for this post is a good indication of one thing I hate. (And, no, it is not lists.)

1. Doing laundry
2. Poor journalism
3. People who take the elevator up one floor
4. People who take the elevator down to go up because they cant wait the 5 seconds it will take for it come back up
5. People who sit on a machine or bench forever with out doing anything at the gym
6. Inconsistant and unfair grading of assignments
7. People who lack common sense
8. The phrase "pet peeves" (It is my pet peeve, I guess you could say. Just not around me.)
9. Unreliable internet connection
10. People who wear plaid and stripes
11. People who think David Letterman, Jay Leno, and/or Jimmy Fallon are funny
12. People who try to distroy something you and your best friends worked so hard for
13. Hotels and buildings that skip Floor 13
14. College freshmen who don't know how to drink Four Loko, ruining it for everybody
15. Paying six cents a page to print stuff at the library
16. People who don't stay to the right when walking. (This is America, people.)
17. People who don't read my blog or follow me or at least read my Twitter. (You suck.)

National "Don't Touch My Junk" Day

So today is the busiest travel day of the year. Millions of people going to airports to fly all across the country. These people are going through the typical day at the airport: waiting in line at the ticket counter, checking bags, having IDs checks, getting boarding passes, proceeding to security, taking shoes off, putting items on the conveyor belt to go throw the metal detector, then getting their junk touched? That's not how security goes. Well, now it is. You could be randomly selected to get put through a full body scan where the screener can see you naked. Don't worry, the screener is in a separate room and your face is removed. Or you can opt out of that and get patted down. Intimately.

One woman said she was selected because of her breasts. I mean, let's get serious though. If you were a TSA worker and had the chance, wouldn't you? Either one of your buddies gets to see her in a full body scanner or you get to watch another woman rub her down. Sounds like a win-win to me.

Because of this AAA expects record highway traffic. Why not? Airport travel is becoming way too much of a hassle. And who wants people to see/touch their junk? Unless its in bed. Then that's alright. But the TSA isn't going in my bed. They are too much of a whore.

The Hardest Thing About The Return of Greatness

What's the hardest thing about me starting to write this blog again? Not keeping up with the posts; trust me, there are plenty of things I can beat the world with. It will be this new fangled Twitter thing. 140 characters? How am I supposed to point out stupid ass things and people with only 140 characters? It will be a challenge. Who decided 140 anyway? It's a random number. I mean sure it ends in a zero, but why not 150? That makes more sense. Maybe 140 was Mr. Twitter's (that's who made it right?) lucky number. But that's a big lucky number. But it's definitely possible. And for the long winded rants and victories, come here. You'll get your dose.

By the way, check out the Twitter feed on the left of this page. Or follow me. But not too closely, I hate when people step on the back of my shoes.

Returning November 18

Beating The World One Day At A Time is coming back. Thursday, November 18 be on the look out for the return of awesome on your computer.

Follow me on Twitter @beatingtheworld.

Until then, don't get too excited. I don't want your heart to explode from the intense increase in heart rate. Then you won't be able to read this because you would be dead. So grab a paper bag and breathe into that if you have to until then, but don't worry, it will be here before you know it.

Maybe We Can Just Let Tiger Golf Now?

He did his apology (if thats what you want to call it). He did two interviews. He did a press conference. Maybe now people can finally stop with Tiger Woods and his problem with keeping his penis in his pants and let his clubs do the talking.

I am still very frustrated that he is returning to play in the Masters this year. Don't make it sound like you have no idea when you are returning to golf when you apologized to the public, Tiger. You knew all along you would play in the 2010 Masters.

Tiger has at least 36 holes to prove he is ready to return though. Personally, I don't think he will make the cut. He didn't make the cut after the death of his father (2006 U.S. Open) and that obviously had a severe emotional toll on him. If Tiger is truly sorry, if he is truly upset at himself because of his actions, he will not make the cut. Tiger in his press conference said that this is the hardest thing emotionally he has dealt with. We will see.

Is This Woman's Density Below 1.0?

I guess it takes all kinds of people to make the world go 'round, but I think this lady is slowing the earth down. Her goal: to become the fattest woman on earth.

People like this always make me wonder. Like I don't know why anyone would want to be 1,000 pounds. That's about the total of what 7 or 8 women should weigh, not one.

Her biggest obstacle of getting to her goal weight? Not being able to eat that much food. Not being able to afford the weekly food bill (which is $815 per week). But burning too much calories "running after [her] daughter" is what she worries about. I don't know, but after looking at her picture, I don't think what she does that she thinks is running actually qualifies as running. I would go with, putting your weight forward and hoping her feet catch up. Something like that. But not running.

Also, she thinks her partner "would like if if [she] was a little bigger." I would like it if she wasn't. I would like it if she was a lot smaller. The lucky man, Phillipe, her partner, met her on a plus-size match making site. Really, just one plus?

She already holds the record for being the world's fattest mother to give birth. How would you find where the baby came out under all those rolls?

Only about 400 pounds to go, Donna.

The Savior is Stupid

When I saw this report on ESPN, my day could not have been any better. It was posted on ESPN.com yesterday, and is nowhere to be found today. (But I found it. Score one for me ESPN.) But maybe that's because it shows how Tim Tebow (who from what I hear is God, not a god, but the head honcho) is stupid. Well, below the average intelligence of an NFL quarterback, and if it weren't for Vince Young (overall stupid, based on his Wonderlic score), Michael Vick (you know what happened), and Eli Manning (who missed the smart gene in his family, it went to Peyton) bringing the average down, Tebow would be more than just average.

Fun fact: the last seven Super Bowl winning quarterbacks' average Wonderlic score: 30. Tebow's Wonderlic score: 22. I am surprised he didn't pray before the test. I am surprised I saw another college quarterback work as hard (read: harder) than him, the rest of the year (tear, sniffle, tear). Sam Bradford scored 36.

But hey Timmy, it's ok. You know God still loves you because he loves everyone. It does help that you apparently are him, though. I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

Sucks for These Guys

Lesson learned, don't try Slamball at home. It could end up not being so good.

Also, I hope this guy is checking the tire pressure. Who said golf isn't a contact sport?

Eye of the Tiger

In case you haven't heard, Tiger Woods had a news conference, apology, speech today. For those of you who thought we has sincere, honest, and heartfelt, what were you watching? That speech was so forced, that apology was bullshit, and he had no genuine emotion. At all. Whatsoever.

I want to believe Tiger, I do. I know what he means to the sport. Unfortunately, I cannot believe him. And my disbelief came well before this whole photo op of him "crying" and hugging his mom.

Tiger Woods had a image of being perfect, not just on the golf course, but also in his personal life. That was a lie. He obviously was not perfect in his personal life. Also, when he was playing, you always heard that his colleagues said that they respected him. They never said they liked him. He is not the role model we thought he was.

And now, bad PR move after bad PR move, here we are, with this ridiculous, robotic, over-rehearsed "apology." I simply could not believe him in this speech. I couldn't. His breaks in the speech were not genuine; his hand gestures (when he used them) were fake. I have to say this is another bad PR move. I don't care what his therapist said to do, that this was the time to do this. It was not. If he truly was sorry, he would have known more than three months after the fact. He should have spoke three days after, not three months.

And Tiger, if you don't want the media to fabricate stories, don't give them three months to do so. Don't blame the media for writing that you wanted to get back at Accenture and tell them to get their facts straight. If you don't give the media facts, there is no way for them to get their facts straight. You are the top golfer in the world. You are the face of golf. The media and the general public care about you more than the other 155 golfers in the field. That is how the world of journalism is when you are top dog.

Hey media: I am calling it: Tiger will not return in 2010. So please stop writing reports that he will play in next week's event, or the week after's. Get your facts straight. (See what I did there?)

To be honest, while what he did was bad, he could have done much worse. He could have raped someone. He could have killed someone. If anyone is to blame, it is not Tiger, but his PR people, creating, presenting, and marketing into something he was not. The Tiger who throws clubs and swears is the real Tiger. Now we know.

Extreme Monday Blues

Today is officially Blue Monday, the gloomiest of all days in the year. This article is from a UK newspaper, and Britain does not celebrate Martin Luther King Day, so they have to go to school.

Looming Christmas debts, cold temperatures, and the wait for the next paycheck are all cited as reasons why today is the people feel the most depressed.

But, in America, we don't have to work today. We have off because of MLK Day. So not only did Martin Luther King give us a major step toward equal rights, he also gave us a day off on the most depressed day of the year.

Thank you, Martin Luther King, Jr.

From the "What the Hell" File

Every now and then, I come across an article that simply makes me think, for real? But today was a coal mine (I am in West Virginia. I guess that would be a gold mine for the rest of you.) for this kind of stuff. Get ready, this ride could be turbulent.

• Ever try to get out of jury duty? Imagine being a cat, getting called for jury duty.
• Make sure your name, or at least the name of your kids or young relatives don't have the same name as a member of the terrorist watch list.
• I guess these Weight Watchers members did not lose enough weight.
• Osama bin Laden could be in your backyard, and you don't even know it, because he now looks like this, says the government.
• In other government news, all the government's failures are because of outdated computers.
• If I ever stop writing this blog, I could always race cars.

Either today was a slow day, or a hysterical day.